Dreams of happy familes

Only a short one coz I got a headache.

I had a strange dream last night. It was a happy family sort of dream, not much was different except Sophie's father was living with us, I'll call him Richard.

I don't know what made me think of him since I haven't seen him in 7 years, we stopped talking once he found out I was pregnant, might have something to do with the fact he was engaged and it wasn't to me. He hung up on me after I told him, he didn't let me say that I wasn't expecting him to split up with his fiancee.

I left his name off the birth certificate, something which pissed my mother off as I wouldn't tell her who he was.

I was 19 when I got pregnant, there was a party at his house and I got very drunk, he joined in while I was having some fun with another girl.

Avoiding the issue

I intended to post earlier in the week but didn't get enough time. I did however manage to watch the wedding dvd, I hate watching myself on TV.

Ok so onto the main event.
For those of you who have been following what's going on recently regarding a certain someone of the male species I apologise for my constant complaints about his behaviour towards me and your right that I haven't done anything to dissuade him either.
If I'm honest then I would say that the underlying factor behind my complaints is quite simple, he's a guy and I'm a lesbian and want to continue to be so, but in fact I do actually enjoy the attention he's been giving me recently. I'm not sure if I like him or just the attention after all the problems I had with Rebbecca and I was doing all the chasing there.

I haven't told him about my sexual preference because at the moment I assume that he just thinks I'm a girl who may or may not be interested in him. If I tell him then I'm either telling him that I'm not interested and for him to back off or I'm telling him I am interested and for him to continue with full valour. It's not that I enjoy him not knowing it's just I feel that is the more comfortable of situations at the moment. To use a more simple analogy I'm currently on amber and don't want to move to red or green just yet.

He did want to see me this weekend but I told him I was busy, which I am, but at least I was able to tell him that without inviting him along.

Edit: Come on Lewis Hamilton, you can do it!

Day of leisure - supposedly

Things didn't quite go as planned! so where to start.

About 3 months ago Katherine's cat had kittens and being the warm loving person that I am I offered to home one of them as the landlord here is only strict about bigger animals. So I get home from work on Friday to find the new flatmate had moved in, lucky it's been house trained, Katherine was also kind enough to bring a few supplies (but I find out later that I paid for them).

It's a male cat nearly all black with a few small white patches, it's been named Shadow.

So on Friday evening I get a call from you know who, he wants to know if I have plans for Saturday so I explain that I already have plans and the conversation continues. I'm not sure how it happened, either I invited him or he invited himself but the result is that he will be joining us on Saturday. I'm usually quite assertive, what is it with this guy, arrrrrrrgh!

Anyway I wake up this morning with a kitten laying beside me purring, it didn't take the thing long to figure out that I'm it's only source of food, well for this weekend anyway.

Sophie's also up nice and early even though I've explained god knows how many times that it doesn't open until 10am. I had considered going out early to get a 1 piece swimsuit as I'm not entirely comfortable with Jack seeing me a bikini but then I decide that since countless people have already seen me in it one more isn't going to hurt.

I explained to Sophie in the car that we're going to be joined by someone else, she's not as concerned as I expected, she's usually not very happy about people taking my attention away from her but on this occasion she's fine with it.

We meet Jack outside, he got the bus down which makes me think he's planning on going back to mine later. We quickly join the queue as a coach pulls up, there's a lot of people around so I'm expecting the pool to be busy. As we get closer to the booth Jack mentions about a family ticket (2 adults and 1-2 children) which includes a free children's meal, I tell him to just worry about himself but it's too late he's bought one. Once inside there's another desk where you get your locker keys and a towel (for a deposit), unfortunately one family ticket means one locker key and not only that it's in the family changing room, I manage to convince him of the virtues of using separate cubicles.

He's waiting for us by the lockers and we head off towards the pool. As soon as we emerge from the changing rooms I'm instantly recognised, a group of Sophie's friends are in the pool with their mothers, I don't think they are aware of my sexual preference so have probably already jumped to the wrong conclusion, arrrrrrrgh! . Sophie immediately goes to join her friends which leaves me with Jack and a group of women anxiously waiting for me to introduce him, what's more they're all wearing swimsuits so I'm the odd one out in the bikini, arrrrrrrgh!

The first thing one of the women says before I have a chance to speak "Sophie never said her father was so handsome" arrrrrrrgh! Jack's quicker off the mark than me and puts them right but also suggests that we're dating, arrrrrrrgh!

We leave the group by the kiddies pool and walk towards the main pool which is quieter than I had expected, Jack attempts to push me in until I state that I would cut off part of his manhood since I can't swim. He jumps in while I gracefully use the steps like a lady ;)

I spend the next half hour keeping Jack at bay while keeping an eye on Sophie, although there is a group of mothers and a lifeguard who could help if she had a problem. He finally wins in his attempt to pull me into deeper water which means I have to put my arms around him to hold myself above the water, although I'm sure he already considered that, arrrrrrrgh!

On getting out the pool Jack gets all our stuff out the locker, in the cubicle I turn to him to ask him to leave so we can change but he's already naked and looking for his boxers, I quickly turn back before he sees me and I notice that I'm blushing. He gets dressed and says he'll meet us outside, I try not to look at him since my face is still quite red, something Sophie takes great delight in pointing out once he's gone, then she says that the boys in her class aren't as big as Jack which I immediately bite on before I realise she's playing me.

To fast forward a bit, once leaving the pool we eat before going bowling which I win, yay :)

We don't go to the cinema in the end and instead come back here, with Jack still in tow.

Back in the apartment we've lost Shadow, I let them two look for him while I sit down, only to be pounced on by aforementioned kitten, with it's claws out the kitten manages to draw blood, luckily it's confined to my shoulder blade, Jack offers medical assistance but I have to take my shirt and bra off for him to do so properly. arrrrrrrgh! His hands are cold which make my nipples react, not that he can see since I've got my arms crossed.

I'm not exactly sure what happened next as I think I drifted off into a day dream. Sophie's voice snaps me back into reality. I'm leaning back with my arms beside me while Jack is kissing my neck while fondling my breasts. arrrrrrrgh!

I sort Sophie out and decide I need to kick Jack out, he wants to stay so he can finish what he started, I tell him I'm kicking he out so he can't finish what he started. He pulls me close and starts kissing me, I can feel the day dream state returning but manage to snap back and I push him out and shut the door, much to his amusement.

I think all I've managed to do is encourage him, arrrrrrrgh!

As you can probably see the day didn't go as I had planned.

Free t-shirt to the person who can guess how many arrrrrrrgh!'s I used. <- Joking!

Mid week update

Does Thursday count as mid week?

Well I'm looking forward to the weekend, Laura is going away with which ever love interest she's currently involved in and I have no work to do so it's just me an Sophie, yay :)
It's been a while since it's just been the two of us so I think it will be good. I'm thinking of taking her to a local leisure complex (swimming, bowling, cinema & food) on Saturday for a bit of fun, I can't actually swim but I do enjoy time in the pool and no I don't wear armbands!

I think I should also get stuck into another book, it's been a while since I finished the last one and quite enjoyed it, although spending too long reading made my eyes hurt, perhaps I need glasses.

Ok so that's my mid week update, thanks for tuning into channel Jessica, next the weather ;)

Free food

So on Friday afternoon I get a call from Jack. He said that he's going out for a meal with some friends in the evening, apparently one of the friends can't go, he did tell me why but I've forgotten. He asked if I would like to go , my reply was "umm..." so he continued that the meal had already been paid for in advance so I would only have to pay for any drinks I had. The fact that I had to pay for my own drinks was a relief that he wasn't trying to ask me out on a date. He told me the name of the restaurant, I've been there before and it's a very nice place, so I told him I'd have to check if my sister would be home to look after Sophie and agreed to call him back in about an hour's time.

Laura has been out every Friday night for the past 6 weeks so I didn't expect that night to be any different, I wasn't sure if I wanted to go out but would have rather had a valid excuse not to go than try and fake it. So I called Laura and said a friend had asked me to join them, I didn't mention it was Jack, unfortunately she had no plans and was more than happy to stay in with Sophie, they like to have a girlie night together sometimes.

I left it an hour and a half before calling Jack, I now had his number since he called me. I told him that I was available that evening, I could hear him grinning down the phone as he told me he was meeting his friends in a bar near the restaurant about 8:30, I began regretting the decision to go even before I hung up.

Because of work I got home late at about 7. I was already stressing as that only left me about an hour and a half to get ready and that's not long for a girl, I had planned to be fashionably late and meet them at 8:45 seeing as it would only take about 15 minutes to get to the restaurant from my place. To my surprise I found clothes and the rest of my stuff already laid out on my bed, knowing I would be stressed about getting home late Laura and Sophie had gone through the trouble getting my stuff ready, which kind of made me a little guilty as I've never done that for Laura.

I climbed into a nice warm bath that was being prepared as I entered the apartment, I lay there and almost fell asleep until Sophie joined me, although I bathe her regularly it's been a while since we've both been in the bath together so it was a nice fun 5 minutes, and we managed to get Laura in the bath too but she was fully dressed at the time, since I was going out I didn't have to clean up either.

The girls had done a good job and had decided on a red theme for me that evening, they picked out a lovely red dress which I hadn't worn in ages but it still fits! with matching underwear (which I wasn't planning on letting anyone see) and a pair of burgundy high heels which went well with the dress, they had also picked out lipstick, makeup and jewelry.

Laura gave me a lift so I only had to walk a short distance to the bar. Seeing everyone else that night I suddenly had a feeling that I was somewhat over dressed but that changed once I met Jack and his friends as they were equally dressed up. There was 6 of us in total, it wasn't anyone I recognised from the reception but they seemed like couples and were slightly confused when I mentioned I was subbing at the last minute for someone else, which if I was a paranoid person would lead me to believe there was no other person.

The meal was lovely, I had a prawn cocktail for starts with scampi salad for main course followed by a beautiful chocolate eclair. The guys disappeared when the coffee arrived, I think they went to pay the bill as I didn't end up paying for any of the drinks I had. The girls were unusually quiet while the guys were away leading me to believe that had been told not to interrogate me, they did ask about the wedding as the way Jack had explained how I became the brides daughter for the day had confused them.

After the meal we went back to the bar we had been in earlier for a few more drinks, it was a lot busier than before. Jack walked me to the taxi rank and kissed me on the cheek before I got in. I got home about 1am to find Laura and Sophie asleep together on the sofa.

I also managed to somehow scratch the screen of my mobile phone, well 3 scratches, dam things!

Close call

The image to the right was the sign facing me as I attempted to drive through one of those stupid road narrowing's this morning.

The image to the left was the sign facing the bloke coming the other way, unfortunately we met in the middle but luckily we avoided hitting each other. Since there was no accident I didn't see any point in stopping to discuss the matter, I didn't look to see if he felt the same, but which of us do you think was in the wrong?

Nightmares

I had the strangest of dreams last night.

I was running through a large house in the dark trying to scream because something was chasing me, only no sound was coming out my mouth and I was struggling to breath. I can only remember the last bits before I woke up, I opened my eyes and for a moment the last image of the dream and the sight before me blurred into the same image.

Oh and I ended up being late for work!

Edit: I just noticed this is my 50th blog entry...

Mother

Here comes the conversation I hadn't been looking forward to.

I had barely set foot inside my mothers house before she asked how I got on with the handsome young fellow, who I'll refer to now on as Jack.

Trying not to get drawn in I ask who she's referring to, she narrows it down the the guy I left the wedding party with. Now when I don't want to get into a conversation like that with mum I usually throw a few crude remarks in (which she doesn't like), it usually has the desired effect of making her change the subject. So I ask if Jack's the brother of the gorgeous red head with the nice boobs I was chatting to.

Anyway the conversation continues for a bit and I finally own up to remembering the guy she's talking about. This is where she tells me a few more facts about Jack which gets me thinking how does she know, apparently she was talking to his mother at the party. Then a thought hits me, since she knows a few things about him what has she told his mother about me?

"I didn't lie, I said that your a single mother who may be looking for a partner".

Ok she didn't lie I gave her that, but she wasn't entirely truthful either, she neglected to mention that said partner would be lacking a Y chromosome.

Feeling like I'm winning the argument (well conversation anyway) she mentions that Sophie got along great Jack. I'm starting to get a bit paranoid here! It seems my daughter had been introduced to Jack shortly before he was introduced to me.

Before I can give her hell she starts showing me photos from the wedding. She skipped through them quite quickly as there was one in particular she wanted to show me, it was a picture of Jack and me dancing, only I'm resting my head on his shoulder which I don't remember.

The photos get put away and just when I thought I was safe she asks...

"So what did Jack say when you told him you prefer the company of women?"

Bugger, I hadn't told him and she knew, otherwise she wouldn't have asked. I had just spent the last hour or so complaining about her trying to set me up and when it came down to the wire I had forgot to tell the guy he wasn't my type.

Then I had a brain storm, there had been 8 of us out that night so I told her that in the small amount of time I had spent talking to him the subject of me being a lesbian hadn't come up and in fact whether or not he was gay hadn't entered into the topic either (so there!)

Although if I'm honest I think that's 1-0 to mother (dam the woman!)